Misadventures, Misunderstandings, and the Magic of Real Communication
If you’ve ever worked in communications—or even just tried to get your point across clearly—you know it’s not always about the words you use. It’s about how those words land. And that, my friend, depends a whole lot on who’s listening.
It turns out, speaking the same language doesn’t guarantee you’ll actually understand each other. Trust me—I learned this lesson the hard (and kind of hilarious) way.
The Sweetened Condensed Confusion
Back when I was working in Larantuka, a small town in Eastern Flores (NTT), I had an office boy helping out at work. One day, I asked him to buy some sweetened condensed milk from a local store. I even gave him the store name to make things easier.
Not long after, he came back and said,
“Ma’am, they don’t have what you asked for.”
I was confused. “Maybe they’re out of stock?” I suggested.
He stood firm. “No, Ma’am. They just don’t sell it.”
Weird. I’d just seen it there days earlier.
“I’m sure they do,” I said. “I bought it there before.”
Still, he stood firm, even implying I might’ve been mistaken.
Curious, I decided we should go check together. At the shop, I immediately spotted the product sitting right where I remembered. Tons of it!
“There! That’s it!” I said.
He looked, blinked, and said, “Oh! That’s Susu Bendera, Ma’am. Not sweetened condensed milk. You asked for sweetened condensed milk.”
I was stunned. Frustrated, maybe. But a little voice told me not to get upset—something was off here. I took a deep breath, thought about it, and suddenly it clicked: I was the one who messed up.
In Jakarta, where I’m from, “sweetened condensed milk” is a generic name for many brands. But in Larantuka, there was only one brand: Bendera. And everyone simply called it “susu Bendera.” My fancy product terminology meant nothing to him, even though the milk is indeed sweet. It reminded me of how people there called all motorcycles “Honda,” because that was the only brand they’d seen around. Ugh! Clearly, I didn’t understand the local context well enough. And guess what? I wasn’t done making blunders.
Tea, Sugar, and a Side of Miscommunication
Still new in town and staying in a hotel, a few coworkers and I were relaxing on the veranda one evening and ordered drinks.
“Sister, three sweet teas, sugar on the side, please.”
The tea came. Super thirsty from all the talking, we each added a spoonful of sugar from the little bowl she brought… and then took a sip.
BLEGH. Sugar overload. Like, teeth-achingly sweet.
We looked at each other, stunned. Then turned to the waitress.
“But you asked for sweet tea,” the waitress said. “And sugar on the side.”
That’s when it hit us. Of course! She’d already added sugar to make it “sweet tea,” and we, assuming it was plain, added even more.
The girl had done exactly what we asked.
We burst into laughter—at ourselves.
“Whose fault was that?” my friend asked, cracking up.
“Ours,” we both said in unison.
Looking back, we realized we should’ve ordered, “We’d like plain tea, and sugar on the side, please.”
That way, the tea would’ve come unsweetened, and we could sweeten it ourselves.
We couldn’t blame her. She was just doing exactly what we said. Honestly, it’s lucky she didn’t just think we were weird. Ha ha ha!!
When “Train” Means “Motorbike”
And things only get trickier when you realize different regions in Indonesia use different words for the same things. For example, one day we got a message from a local partner:
“Ma’am, I can’t attend the meeting today. My child got hit by a train.”
Wait, what?! A train?! I nearly passed out.
A colleague quickly calmed me down. “She’s from Medan. When she says ‘train,’ she means motorcycle.”
Ohhh. I swear, my emotions did a full rollercoaster in three seconds.
It’s Not Just Language—It’s Culture
All these moments—funny, embarrassing, and eye-opening—taught me an important lesson: communication isn’t just about what you say, but also about how others hear it. Culture, local habits, vocabulary, even brand familiarity—they all play a role.
And this is just verbal language. Nonverbal communication? Whole other level.
Indonesia alone has hundreds of local languages, dialects, and cultural nuances. It’s complicated—but it’s also incredibly beautiful.
I feel lucky to live in a place so diverse. It constantly challenges me to think deeper, stay curious, and remember that real communication takes more than words. It takes empathy, listening, and a whole lot of humility.
So, I believe there are some notes here:
- We can’t assume our “standard” terms mean the same thing everywhere.
- When in doubt, ask, clarify, and check for understanding.
- Embrace the awkwardness. We’ll have wonderful stories to tell.
- And most importantly—always speak to people, not just at them.
